Some thoughts on Northern Ireland TV

Questions I've asked myself when reacquainting myself with Northern Irish television...

Why have UTV reverted to using the 2002 Big Blue Break Bumper before ads? And why haven't they got rid of all of their black break flashes?

Why do all BBC NI local trails have to feature those dodgy rainbow-coloured crowd graphics?

Who on earth commissioned the new Open & Direct advert using "Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini" and the P&O "P and, P and, P and O" ad? And what is the suitable punishment?

And can UTV please cut back on the Dublin's Q102 "Telepathic Friends" adverts? OK, they own the station, but can anyone in Northern Ireland pick the station up?

When did Frank Mitchell pick up Jeremy Paxman-style interview techniques? Did he get them from the same person who gave them to Stephen Nolan?

Why on earth do UTV not bother to edit out the competition segment on the Home Sweet Home repeats? Gillian Porter reminded us TWICE not to bother calling the competition lines as they were closed and didn't seem happy about it

And why are UTV using the old ITV National Weather graphics on their pointless Ski Weather reports?

Why was Joel Taggart reporting from what looked like a makeshift Final Score studio?

Who writes Julian Simmons' scripts? He made lots of fluffs over the weekend and at least twice ran under by 5 seconds, ending up staring into the camera holding a smile...

Isn't Donna Traynor's mullet sweet? And Gillian Porter's mushroom-shaped bob? And did Audra Thomas do the job for them? And what cutting edge hair do can I expect Audra to have this time?

WHY did they have to change the voiceover on the Diet Coke ad with the turtle to James Nesbitt?

Do Apple realise a TV station in Northern Ireland have ripped off their iPod adverts to promote a football show? Having said that, the UTV trails for The Football Show and Kelly are wonderfully produced.

Additionally, what is The Football Show like? Is it true that Logie is the main presenter? Does it compare favourably or unfavourably with Soccer Night? (Believe me, it can't be as bad as Soccer Night Extra with Andy Townsend...)

Why can't Keith Burnside get Martin Scorsese or Alex Maskey's name correct when he reads the news on Radio Ulster?

And isn't Gavin Andrews of Season Ticket pleasant to the eye?

I should come back home more often...

Funny, I thought it was Colm Murphy? Maybe it is on RTÉ, though why one northerner would be replaced by another...

Perhaps it is Colin Murphy, to me it sounded more like James Nesbitt which is why when I first saw it I reached for the remote as quickly as possible...

Then once I turned back to UTV after that ad had finished they showed a Yellow Pages ad

The "people" on the BBC ONE NI trails are temporary, and tie in with the trail campaign highlighting the amount and range of local programming from BBC Northern Ireland.

As to the pronunciation of Alec/Alex Maskey... wayyyy back in the dark old days when I used to read the news he was most definatley Alex Maskey. For reasons best known to himself, he is now Alec Maskey.



murf1000 claims he can from his hilltop in south Armagh. But you're right, the vast majority of people in Northern Ireland cannot pick it up. But then it's been a long time since UTV cared more about the people in it's official service area than outside of it.

Yes we can recieve most of the Dublin stations in the upper regions of South Armagh.

Worst voice on television: UTV's Julie O'Connor.

are you sure you are getting Dublins Q102 or are you getting Q102.9 from Londonderry??

No I doubt they know and it wouldn't have been aied if there was any breech of copyright about it, however I agree about the trails being "wonderfully produced"

I also know their advertising prices are stupidly high. A client wanted to advertise on UTV for 2 weeks at a total of about 20 adverts split 50/50 over peak/off peak.

The price was 8k after bargaining / incentives. Advertising in ITV London turned out to be less.

UTVs excuse: viewship in the republic apparently even though the advert wasn't aimed at them.

I used to be able to receive Q102.9 from the North West in Lurgan on a good day, I think once due to atmospheric conditions I could pick up the Dublin station 104FM too from Lurgan as well.

It probably is possible to pick up the Dublin local stations from Newry and South Armagh, perhaps further north, as when I'm back in Northern Ireland I can pick up the RTE stations and Today FM on their Southern frequencies.

When I am at home at the weekend if i get bored I will check to see what Dublin stations are available.

In other NI TV news, TG4 launches on analogue terrestrial Friday week...

http://www.tg4.ie/bearla/nuac/ntg4.htm#

If we could widen this to broadcasting as opposed to just television, and substitute "oddest" for "worst", look no further than Downtown Radio's Brian Moriarty. Cracking voice, certainly distinctive!