Top of the Pops

Seeing the Smash Hits cover from October 1985 with the Pete Burns and Morrissey cover shot just made me think of one quite appalling thought actually.....just how hideous would Morrissey now look like if he'd gone through as much facial vandalism as Pete Burns. Yikes!

It took me about three glances before I realised that was a genuine Pete Burns geisha girl style image you posted Andy. Scarcely believable it's the same as the decent looking man from the 80's. Just very sad. It's got to be an extreme manifestation of body dysmorphic disorder.

He just messed up his brain instead with the crap he comes out with every time he opens his mouth.

The Countdown Capers
19th September 1985 (Our TuneLord & Poptastic Pete)

Part Deux

Following a distinct feeling of deja vu for expectant early BBC4 viewers who waited a fortnight for some Pops action, only for it to be unceremoniously gatecrashed by news of a wedding & that 12 Year old who does the weather, "Normal Service is resumed".

The blighter's been immediately promoted to BBC middle-management on the proviso he attends a Week-long BBC training course explaining the button layout of a basic remote control, but at least there's a Certificate at the end.

If that kind of stuff up happened in Herr Hurll's day he'd have probably shot a cheerleader, but apparently that's not allowed these days.

It's Health and Safety gone mad!

We (eventually) cut back to Our Tune, who's in a buoyant mood in his ice-cream salesman "Sports casual" jacket to damn Middlesbrough with faint praise before introducing..

(10) Madge's Angle Grinder



Certain artists reach a level of success (and sometimes hype), where you get the feeling if the sound of them trumping in a wheelie bin was captured and subsequently released into the mainstream it would be a best seller.

This one's way better than the prospect of the sound of methane on vinyl, but "Angel" I felt was always a good album track rather than a choice of single.

That said, It has much to recommend it and reveals a softer side to Madge, carried forward from "Borderline" and "Crazy for You", this one being more subtle than her more ambitious lyrical hits.

I thought she looked beautiful on the cover, showing a vulnerability that seems to have gradually deserted her.



I may have mentioned before the "Angel" cover being part of a Herb Ritts photoshoot from 1985, in which Madonna never looked better.

Clickety below.
http://squaremadonnaicongallery.altervista.org/1985-madonna-by-herb-ritts/

Being a bit of a pop tart with a penchant for more of her uptempo 80s numbers, this track isn't one of my absolute faves (unlike her next single), but seemed more of a stopgapped Warner money raker, with it's cobbled together "Chopped Ham & Pork" video from a variety of previous releases suggesting that Warners were in full Madge milking mode.

I always thought it was a shame the powers that be didn't go for this instead, but that's showbiz.



NEXT!!

8 - Strictly Dad Dancing



As far as competition for requirements go, in this chart Bonnie's more definite and decisively single minded, whilst Midge is a bit more ponderingly airy-fairy with his choices, musing on a selection of if's, buts & maybe's, which if you were involved in planning his Performance & Development Review couldn't be described as SMART goals.

Poor Midge seems bereft of physical direction here, not least with his Dad dancing which makes Russ Abbot look like Michael Flatley, along with a coat that seems to have been designed with a World War I "Dazzle Ship" in mind.



Perhaps for this performance Midge was hoping he might similarly disappear from the footage like those clever pens you can get, but at least if the "Dazzle coat" failed he might be able to lie low under the abundance of excessive fog Herr Hurll has chosen to deploy, which in an ironic twist might explain why Midge had to wear the dreadful coat in the first place.

A more awkward experience you couldn't wish to witness, but despite all of the above, I liked his first solo album at the time, the cover showing a dashing and debonair Midge giving it the full 1950's-inspired black & white film star pout.



I particularly liked the lesser-played follow up to "If I Was", which I'm unsure if it was featured on 'the Pops' (clickety below).

The dancing doesn't get any better but the coat is a definite improvement, and at least he's got (then) wife Annabel Giles by his side....



Next, we continue our Weekly rummage with...

the Top 40 Breakers,
beginning with...

(35) The Singing Cod - with Double Chips



Larry Blackmon's famous 'codpiece' has yet to become fully formed for it's rouge-coloured debut 'next Year', but in the meantime the Cameo front man flaunts his single life status by driving around in Magnum P.I.'s Ferrari, and in a bizarre and unexpected twist gets to say "I don't" whilst unsuitably attired in a Wedding dress.

Somehow I don't think the House of Windsor would stand for it.

(31) Rene & Edith - It's Not Good



Squelchy mid-tempo with a funky twist and reminiscent of a lightly-pitched Yarbrough & Peoples, this classy slice of soul is enhanced by the presence of not one, but two Yamaha DX-7's which........and get this pop pickers......... rotate!

A classy bit of soul with a video a bit like the P. Diddy/Police mash-up, but rather than falling off a motorbike like Mr. Diddy, Ange nearly gets her "Soul Glo" ignited by a passing Boeing 727.

As you do.



(25) Bone Idle - Careful Whisper



Not content with presiding over the weirdest nuptials you're ever likely to see, Mr. Broad now pummels the "White Wedding" reception with ROCK AND ROLL of the noisiest kind, as you can tell by the use of capital letters.

This one's hardly "first dance" material.

Even worse for the bride's parents who are paying for the shindig, the venue's now overrun with sweaty rockers yelling for (and I quote)....

" MORE, MORE, MORE "

Perhaps the baying mob are referring to the depleted stock level at the buffet, by this time bereft of sausage rolls, and with that many perspiring people invading the reception like an advancing Rock Regiment the beer's likely to be undrinkably warm.

I often wonder if there was an invisible hook attached to Billy Idol's upper lip enabling the rock legend to raise it so far up his face (like catching an in-flight salmon), but whoever's doing the reeling on this fishing trip is giving the reel a damn good yank, as the sneer is almost to the top of his nose with this one.

I dare say it's providing entertainment to keep the baying mob distracted from their hunger, which musically is a stone-cold classic that never dates.

Sneer delight again from Billy, a massive thumbs up from yours truly and one that demands to be turned up to 11.

In advance of tonight's Peachy grinathon (twice if the BBC leave the intern in charge again), here's the corresponding chart for the 7.30 festival of fun from....

26th September 1985 (Miss NotShort & Peachy Dix)

"If you don't wish to know the score, please look away now"
http://www.officialcharts.com/charts/singles-chart/19850922/7501/

How can I compete with all that above. I was even going to use the Peachy Dix spoonerism tonight but you beat me to it.

This reminds me of one of my favourite lyrics - "Peaches come in a can, they were put there by a man" a top ten hit a decade later. Without googling, the group who sang those words was.....?

Janice Long looked overly made up by her standards tonight I thought. But hey, that was the mid 80's effect taking full hold by late '85 I suppose. Jennifer Rush in her performance tonight absolutely encapsulates the female style of that moment in time to utter perfection. One hell of a notable performance that finally shot The Power Of Love all the way to being the 1985 best seller. I loved that song at the time, yet as a 16 year old sixth form schoolboy I probably shouldn't have done, and I don't think I'd have shouted about it too loudly all the same. I still remember the sixth form common room, all gathered around the radio at 1pm precisely on Tuesday 8th October 1985 when Gary Davies announced Jennifer Rush had made No1 and there were groans a plenty.

I'm actually nowhere near as keen on the song nowadays. It should have been the other way around surely?

Have to say that the three Top 40 breakers they showed in video clip format, Five Star, The Damned and Dead Or Alive were absolutely terrible the lot. Hated Five Star in the late 80's and still do just the same. Some kind of sub-Aldi Jacksons. The guy who swore at them on Saturday Superstore spoke for very many of us that morning. Was thrilled when it all went pear(son) shaped only three years later. They ended up the most vulgar of 80's materialistic excess. Their first debut hit in '85 was okay and I can tolerate The Slightest Touch but no more of their output. Lead vocals on Love Take Over were so weak.

The Damned was utterly forgettable. Zero memory of it. As for Dead Or Alive with the rather prescient song, full title My Heart Goes Bang (Get Me To The Doctor) it reeked badly of poor 80's production. The actual song needed major surgery - maybe an octuple by pass.

Depeche Mode with It's Called A Heart seemed to be in the comfort zone of a string of standard sounding and teen placing hit singles at this point. They must have had more hit singles peak between 11 and 19 than any other group, this was their 7th of 21 in total to date to do so.

I'm with Janice on Rebel Yell by Billy Idol, his second No6 hit in the summer of '85. He deserved to maintain his solo success in my opinion but this was his high point ultimately. A studio visit would have been a bonus. I really do hate the way that TOTP now it's been straightjacketed into a rigid half hour slot has mostly become a show consisting of truncated video clips at the expense of proper full length performances. I'd rather hear the full song or none of it at all. Same view now on that as I did then.

I was wondering how to define what genre of music The Lodgers by Style Council actually fits into. I wonder what his former Jam bandmates were making of Weller's chart output at this time, three years after they disbanded. It seems so far removed from his recent history. I remembered The Lodgers, but it just went nowhere very interesting. I think that was Dee C.Lee on backing vocals who was close to getting her own Christmas '85 classic top three hit anyway, with See The Day

Good to see Bonnie Tyler get a final go at Holding Back For A Hero at No2 for the third week running.

Last week at No1 for David Bowie in his singles chart career unfortunately. The video was seen as nothing special and just a quick on the hoof job to go with the song at the time but it does seem to have taken on the cult classic status over the years since. Is it a bad video, or a good one? Is it so bad it's good? I tend to think the latter.

Oh, and I thought Paul Weller looked very hot and it might not have been just the lights. This might go down as the hottest ever late September edition of TOTP, as 26th September 1985 was in the midst of a true Indian summer heatwave. It may have now been the autumn but the hottest day of the year was yet to come, on 1st October believe it or not.

Which reminds me, a great Cloudbusting video soon to come on TOTP 1985 by Kate Bush.

I really don't know where to post this. It's kinda TOTP related but at the same time, isn't.

Of course, we all know about 'the other place', but there's also a thread on Roobarb's Forum (zetaminor.com). Obviously I want to partake in that discussion so I created an account. Your required to activate your account via email before you can post, except I never received an email and there's no resend option.

There's also a thread by the admin saying if you have issues with account creation to PM him. Only you can't, because PM's are deactivated until your account is activated.

So what I'm asking is, if any of you have an account over there, could you help me out? My account over there is the same name as this one.

Check the spam folder in your emails.

It's empty

I've always presumed that the chart run downs, even in a live edition of TOTP, are pre-recorded inserts by the show presenters. However on the last edition with Dixie Peach he briefly stumbled as he was reading at No35 and it left me thinking they would surely not leave such a verbal stumble and would re-record it, so therefore maybe he was reading the countdown as live. Any thoughts on this?

Also I notice the name of Paul Jordan is co-presenting alongside Steve Wright on the next edition from 3rd October 1985. I almost certainly watched that show at the time but can honestly say I have got zero memory of this name or anything about him at all. Even checking out a picture meant nothing either. My normally sharp and impeccable memory has failed me on him.

At the end of the last show I'm sure Peachy spluttered that Paul Jordan is with Gary Davies, so a change of plans clearly

A quick look online reveals that Paul Jordan presented a total of 6 shows and his first was indeed 03 October 1985 with Gary Davies.

Every time we get to a new presenters' debut episode (like we are with Paul Jordan), I always worry they'll have "done a Smith" and blocked their episodes. Though admittedly that's unlikely, it seems to be a very strange and unique situation, I'm still not sure presenters have that ability and there's some sort of gentleman's agreement there.